Look what I found! An unpublished draft! From this time last year (5.29.2014). Beats the hell out of writing something new. Gift with purchase? It is seasonally accurate. BAM.


The Kidling is sick. Before you take pity, Dear Readers, we are talking about a different kind of illness.

School sick.

The Kidling had a rough re-entry into school after the long weekend of fun and activity. She spent several days with one set of grandparents, then got to spend an afternoon and evening with another grandma.

Lucky booger.

The Kidling: I’m school sick!
Natalie: What do you mean, Kidling?
The Kidling: I’m sick of working, I’m sick of learning, and I’m sick of talking about reading!

Someone is over this school year.

The Kidling at Outdoor Discovery Camp, part deux

Day 4

The Kidling: (yelling to me) NEVER EAT SOGGY WAFFLES!

The Mama: Um… Okay. I won’t.

The Kidling: No! North, East, South, West! Never Eat Soggy Waffles.


The Kidling at Outdoor Discovery Camp

Day 3 (Yes, I missed days 1 and 2. Sue me)

“We went geocaching, but the geos weren’t geodes.”

sage advice

The Kidling recently finished up her year at pre-school. Graduated, if you will. This, of course, means that we had to figure out what to do with her over the summer. Alas, the local before and after school program (hereinafter BASP) saved our ass(es).

BASP is unlike anything The Kidling has previously experienced. Every day they do some fun and exciting activity. Every. Single. Day. She started on Monday and has been having the time of her tiny life. The first three days of this week have brought us:

Monday: A minor league baseball game.
Tuesday: A picnic downtown and trip to the library with her very own library card.*
Wednesday: Hours and hours at a local swimming pool.

Needless to say,** The Kidling has been thrilled and exhausted. That didn’t stop me from taking her to gymnastics yesterday, but whatever. I am a terrible mother.

On the way to said gymnastics class, Alice and I chatted about all of the fun things she did at the pool. It was heartwarming to hear about her adventure with the big kids. Then…

Alice: When I was floating in the swimming pool, all of a sudden I had to pee.

The Mama: What did you do?

Alice: I peed in the water (giggles).

The Mama: (unsuccessfully attempts to hide the horror) Oh! Next time, see if you can make it to the toilet.

Alice: (ignores The Mama) After I was peeing in the water, a little while later, I saw someone scooping a little thing and then drink the water.

The Mama: (gasps) Oh no! That’s why you don’t want to pee in the water, or drink the water.

Alice: Yeah. Because you don’t know who peed and who drinked.

Wiser words were never spoken.


** AKA, Kidling nirvana.
** Notice that I said it anyway? Sometimes I can’t help myself.