work ethic

The Family has been struggling to figure out how to work this whole school work thing into our evening routine.

What? Kindergarten is hard.

Last night, The Dada and I worked out a new course of action. As soon as we get home at the end of the day, the plan shall be:

Discovery activity. Yes, this is homework.
Explore activity. Yes, this is a bribe.

Tonight we tried this for the first time and it was flawless. Positively flawless. After snack, The Kidling wrote two thank you notes for writing practice and it only took two eons. The bribe exploration activity was a fabulous incentive. After watching a wolf documentary (What? It is a school night. We couldn’t get too crazy), we had dinner and moved along with the bedtime routine.

It worked! It really freaking worked!

After a drama free bedtime, The Kidling and I snuggled up in her bed. We chatted a bit and I commented on how pleased I was with the productive and fun evening: writing, wolves, dinner…

The Mama: I’m proud of you, Kidling. Your hard work is really starting to pay off!
The Kidling: (matter-of-factly) You’re forcing me too.
The Mama: Yes I am. It’s my job.

And tonight, I did it well.

the miracle of tape, part one (and two)

Tape as major medical reconstructive tool:

“Wouldn’t it be bad if this part of your leg (gestures toward her knee area) was cut off? Then you would need clear tape! And then your fur wouldn’t stick up.”

And… tape as razor substitute. Maybe someone (ahem) needed to shave.

too much fiber

“My tummy hurts. I feel like I ate the Wizard of Oz book. Yeah. But I didn’t.”

-The Kidling
January 20, 2014

the unlikely logic of a little one

This was the weekend of forts. If you know The Kidling personally (as in, you have met her in real life. I admit that is a wholly arbitrary distinction. Many of you loyal readers surely know her as well as anyone else), this might seem to be an odd statement.

“Aren’t they all weekends of forts?” you are asking your iPads/phones/computer screens. “Wouldn’t a more accurate statement be ‘this is a lifetime of forts.’? The Mama should check with me before clicking ‘publish’. I could tell her a thing or two.”

And you would be right.

But (there is always a ‘but’), I’m talking about something a wee different than usual. Hence, the distinction. I’m the writer, and a weekend of forts, it is. A weekend of forts on her bed. A weekend of forts during which I caved and let The Kidling go to sleep in said forts. Forts, forts, forts, forts, forts.


On that glorious, fort-sleeping evening, The Kidling prepared her bed for a night’s rest. She tucked and adjusted, rearranged and spread. Once everything was in its rightful place, she picked up a flag she had made and looked around the fort with great contemplation. The silver tassels glittered as she waved it around, thinking. Before I had a chance to ask what on earth she was doing, The Kidling thought out loud,

“If only I could find some logical way to stick this in here somehow!”

If, dear Kidling, you find that logic, let me know. I misplaced mine very shortly after your birth.

love is(n’t) in the air

Apparently, there is much talk of love happening these days around The Kidling’s kindergarten classroom.

Seriously, kids, it isn’t even February. Clearly Hallmark has not yet impressed on you the importance of saving up your love (and your money) for that one big day next month.

Thank freaking goodness.

But, as usual, I digress.

The Kidling was sitting at the kitchen table a few days ago when she began to tell me the rules of love (clearly parroted from a teacher), interjecting kindergarten for a little kick.

“If you fall in love at school, you don’t tell. No one falls in love at school. Cam* is in love with Emma. Clara is in love with Max. Jane and Jill are so best friends that they are close to being in love.”

“(shrugs) You could just wait and meet more people and then find someone to fall in love with.”

Um, yeah. A few more people might not be a bad idea. You’ve got to see what’s out there, kids.


* As usual, names have been changed to protect the innocent. And because I don’t remember.

adventures in eating

“I had crab arms before. And I liked them.”

-The Kidling
January 9, 2014

the definitive answer to a burning question: what does the fox say?

“Mommy, you’re wrong. ‘Let the kid do what she wants. Because. It’s her birthday today.’ That’s what the fox says.”

-The Kidling
January 8, 2014

the human nerds system

Bedtime. The Kidling and The Mama talk human anatomy. The topic of the evening is the spine.

The Kidling: Nerds connect to the spine with little pieces of bone.
The Mama: They are actually called “nerves.” Not “Nerds,” like the candy.
The Kidling: Oh.

Also? Pretty sure this is wrong, but I am altogether too lazy to google it.