ring ring ring

Phone calls with children are absurd. I have no idea, frankly, why I even try, as a typical conversation with The Kidling via telephone sounds like this:

Alice: Mommy!

The Mama: Hey Alice! How are you doing?

Alice: Good.

The Mama: What are you up to?

Alice: Playin’.

The Mama: Are you having fun?

Alice: Yeah.

The Mama: Tell me about your day.

Alice: Bye!

That’s if I’m lucky. Sometimes she gets bored after “Good.” and hands the phone back to a grandparent with nary a word of goodbye.

Occasionally, though, we have a real conversation. The Kidling recently spent some time with her grandparents in Nearby Town, which is about 75 miles from Our Town. When I called one evening, The Kidling was feeling quite talkative. This particularly detailed conversation included such gems as:

“Mommy, I feel badder than I’ve ever felt before.”

“Are you done talking yet?”

“Mommy, is it day time on your side of the planet?”

“Do you have anything else to say?”

“I found money at Monsters, Inc.! The round kind!”

Okay, so that first one broke my heart a little bit. Otherwise, this is why I endure monosyllabic conversation after monosyllabic conversation. When The Kidling becomes The Teen, I’ll be damn glad I did.

About The Mamahttp://kidlingville.comProfessional talker, editor, emailer, problem solver, adjunct lecturer, blogger, and mother to the brilliantly absurd Kidling.

12 thoughts on “ring ring ring

  1. When I was a little kid, we had a *party line* (yep, and dinosaurs still roamed the earth)…. I L-O-V-E-D to talk on the phone, and quickly discovered that anytime I picked up there was either (a) an operator available for a little ‘confab’ or (b) someone actually trying to *use* the phone for a conversation, and hey, what’s one more, right? Let’s get this party started! (remember, we’re talking 4-5 years old). Anyhoo, it was a grand old time til my mother cottoned on to what I was up to back in the bedroom and my new refrain anytime I was ‘nabbed with phone in hand (I’m told), was “Oh no, no, I don’t want to talk to the operator!”

    So perhaps you should thank your lucky stars that you don’t have a little ‘telephone magpie’ in your midst at present–or at least that’s what my mother would say… 😉

  2. As a phone hater as an adult (of course, I’m a journalist, so I’m on the phone half the day for work–why? why?), I totally commiserate with her. And my mother, who to this day wishes for heart-to-heart talks on the telephone, commiserates with you.

    • Oh, I feel your pain. She is pretty much the only person I ever want to talk on the phone with. And I live with her. Which makes absolutely no sense. And I am okay with that.

  3. I’ve got boys, and they are usually even less verbose than girls. I’ve found FaceTime to be great way to at least see facial expressions when they scratch and grunt… Lol

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