Alice, as you know, is one of the damn best kids on the planet. What you might not know, depending on how
obsessively regularly you read the book of alice, is that she is not particularly fond of babies. While I wouldn’t use the word “hate” (which she reserves for brussels sprouts), I would not shy away from “avoids” or “dislikes” or even “can sense their potential for tears, spit up, pee, vomit, and general displeasure and thus stays far, far away unless forced to ignore her instincts.”
In short, babies are trouble. The only kind of trouble that my dear child religiously avoids.
But (you saw this coming, didn’t you, dear readers?), The Kidling recently declared exception to the “Avoid Those Smelly Little Troublemakers At All Costs” rule. Once a baby reaches the age of two, The Kidling—in all her benevolence—has declared them fit to receive her assistance.
The Parents view this as progress.
But Alice shocked the hell out of us last week when she decided to make nice with a 20-month-old child. Real nice. Genuine nice. And only twenty months? A full four months shy of the age of Kidling assistance eligibility?!
Color us surprised.
This darling little 20-month-old child is wee even for a wee one. As such, she struggled mightily when trying to climb onto a couch in the lobby of the restaurant we were patronizing. The Kidling, witnessing her struggle, proceeded to pick her up and put her gently on the couch.
Everyone was happy.
The girls continued to play nicely together, with Alice being a delightful little helper to her 20-month-old pal. After many minutes of play during which Alice helped as needed, she decided to switch roles from enabler to encourager. As her pal struggled with the couch-climbing, Alice sidled up next to her and cheered her on, telling her, “You’ve got to use your muscles!”
Coach Al is kind of hilarious.